By this time next week, I will have already walked across the 2014 IFBB Figure International competition stage and competed. I can already picture it now…deciding on what I can or cannot eat as I prepare to make my way over to Australia for one more competition. Getting ready to head over to the expo and have some fun!
Speaking of the expo, I am not working at a booth this year. I have soldered this competition preparation AS an unsponsored athlete, which does afford me freedom in certain aspects. It will be different, and I look forward to checking out the sites, meeting up with my management team FMG (Fitness Management Group), catching up with a few friends, checking out the newest products and maybe buying a few workout outfits. I certainly need them, because I am staying small!
There will be no more wearing men’s clothing. That’s not happening this year, so a proper reverse diet will be essential. I will work all of that out with Dr. Layne Norton after my two competitions, so that I maintain a weight of 125 lbs all year long.
It’s funny to me that, at this point in my prep, I am actually envisioning anything after a competition. In the past at every other competition I have prepared for, I had been panicked, stressed and never thought about any day “after” an event.
As I proceed to dive into the meaning of the title of this blog “Fearless,” please keep in mind that it is not my intention to come off arrogant. If you have followed my career over the years, listened or read interviews I have done, I think you have come to know that I am very humble and grateful for the things that I have earned in my life. Listen, I know that contracts come and go. I have always positioned myself emotionally to accept the ups and downs in that aspect. And, I was never drawn to this sport to soothe my ego or I would be emotionally crushed by now. I mean, realistically, I went from being in magazines around the world to now going at it solo. Either way, I am still me. I am a very nice person with a huge loving heart. That will never change—it is who I was born to be.
Childhood Picture Captures It Best
It’s funny, I have this one picture from when I was little and when I look at it, I smile because it captured my heart perfectly.
Back To Present Day
I do realize that, at this point in my life, I was born to be much more. I wholeheartedly know that if I continue on my current path, my dreams will be realized. This blog, this coming year, my entire life, the person writing these words right now is and will be forever different. Distinctly different. And it will be an honor to show the people that have always believed in me exactly what I mean by that.
Change Is Good
Quite simply, I have never been this calm, this sure or this at peace than I am right now heading into this show. Of course, I expect to be excited for the show and to have natural level of pre-show nerves. That should be expected, and I welcome the anticipation. The primary difference is that for once I feel I may not be completely freaking out on the inside. I am not 100% positive of this, because the show isn’t today. But, I do know that I have never felt the way I do internally.
I am physically prepared—I have always worked hard to come into a show in shape. I mean I have come with a million different looks trying SO hard to make everything “right” for so long. I have tried to do so many things, so many different ways and really that isn’t the issue. Now I am using my previous experience and proper direction and feedback provided to me in combination with the biggest change which is that NOW it’s “right” within me.
Previously, fear blocked my every move most of my life. Today, I will admit gracefully yet definitively………I am not afraid anymore of any situation, online prediction, person or the final outcome. This new feeling I am experiencing solely by the grace of God—that in addition to my absolute die hard mentality of never giving up.
I have searched my entire life to find this feeling. It remained elusive, but I kept searching. Truth be told, physically and mentally, I have worked around the clock for many years to obtain my goals and never give up on my dreams. The final peace came as I began rigorous work spiritually starting in November 2013. Through this work, my entire existence and my life started working when I found a way to put my relationship with God first. And that relationship has set me free. Free from the bondage of fear. That is saying a lot I understand, but when you have this kind of spiritual experience, there is no other subject to speak of really.
In the Face Of Competition
It’s good to never base the future solely on past performances. That is not only the beauty of change in life, but in competition as well. Many champions failed a million times. The ones that find solutions to any issues and persevere are the same ones that indeed eventually become champions. In order to continue as an athlete, you must always believe it can happen for you. That’s what having a dream is all about.
My weight is 121 lbs. I am not sure what it will be onstage. Maybe 119-120…we shall see. ;-)
What My Training Has Been Like
I have not been lifting weights for my upper body. I concentrate on several forms of cardio on multiple machines and some leg training. At about 4 weeks out, I slowed down to a stop with lifting weights. I intend to present a refined, shapely, feminine, healthy body as I enter the show. I did the work in regards to building muscle, so now I am dieting everything down slowly. And, I am letting everything fall into place keeping my eye on my physique to ensure that I maintain total body balance. I do feel tiny!! lol
Current Plans For The Next Few Days
I am organizing for my trip, making last minute errands, checking off things to be done and making sure everything is ready to go.
And most importantly, I cannot stop smiling…and I don’t intend to.
Where Can We Meet Next Weekend?
If you are coming to the Arnold Sports Festival, I would love to meet you! I will be at the Athlete’s Meet & Greet at the Veteran’s Memorial North Hall on Thursday, February 27th from 7pm – 9pm.