A Finish Line Is Approaching
It has been almost five months since I started my “Journey Back To Strength” Blog. I am simply stunned it has been that long already. Considering the normal and healthy range for body fat loss is 1-2 lbs per week, I knew it would take six months…but that 6th month is right around the corner! Just goes to show that not only does it take time to lose the weight, it also takes a lot of effort to get there. And, detours are what make it seem impossible to get there sometimes. So I do understand that it’s a long road for anyone who wants to lose weight. And no matter why you want to lose weight, the need better be rock solid and very much wanted to carry you through to reach your goal. At the conclusion of my journey, which is just around the corner, my total weight loss should be around 42 pounds since my heaviest post operation weight. Mind blowing!
Creating A New Story
I had the visual while writing this blog of stepping on the old fashioned scale at the doctor’s office. I had on my big black boots, leggings and oversized men’s t-shirt on as I recall, and I can hear the nurse calling out 164 lbs as she took note of that in her file. I had no feeling about that other than I had never heard a number like that before. I repeated it out loud and then quietly in my mind over and over. I wanted to absorb the shock value, but it couldn’t penetrate me in a real way because of the medication I was on.
But I knew that only a month earlier I weighed 120 lbs and was on stage at the 2013 Ms. Figure international.
Right when I recall that (either then or now), my mind quickly shifts to the present day moment. For that is all I care to reminisce about that time. I lived it, I lived through it and today, I am in an incredible place physically, emotionally, geographically and spiritually. There is no need to think about or keep bringing up the past. Creating a new story is the way I live my life today. Talking about “then” keeps me locked in that time, which only takes away from the newness of today. Acknowledging the weight lost, which is my current accomplishment, is as far as I need to take my trip down memory lane.
Simple and Quiet Life…But Looking Forward To A New Chapter
I spend most of my time alone. There simply is no comfortable way to make a move back to Florida and then jump in to reconnecting with friends until I am able to do so in a more relaxed way—which would mean outside of the restrictions of contest prep. It’s just the way I feel the least amount of stress, and I am able to really focus on all of the things that are in my control as well as do the things that make me happy. That currently is bringing and becoming a renewed version of Ava Cowan. And only I can accomplish that on my own right now.
I am quite sure that after my next few shows, a new chapter is about to begin in my life. I can feel it, and I am starting to get excited about that too! So for now, I am dead-focused, diligent and leave nothing to chance. Preparing for this show has given me a deep sense of fulfillment, and I feel like myself again. The better version of myself. A major part of this “comeback” is not giving up, because that is one characteristic that my soul feeds off of. So the major setback is actually that which is propelling me through this transformation. And is thrusting me through this prep with serious momentum in a short amount of time.
Preparing to get back on stage feeds that part of me that thrives on not giving up on myself. I know what giving up on myself feels like, and I am not interested in revisiting that mindset.
So, I am in the 120’s now weight-wise. I have a good amount of work to go, but I can assure you that since I don’t do hours of cardio, the minute I increase that, the final amount of weight will come off. Being back in Florida with 80-degree weather isn’t so rough either. The warmer weather is so much better for my muscles, joints and tendons. My only obstacle has been to carry all of my stuff on my solo journey. But never fear…I bought an assistant.
LOL Carrying those bags was bruising my legs, and we can’t have that!
Going For Broke
I am throwing all of my cards on the table here on the home stretch before game day. And yes, they are mostly credit cards. LOL This deal doesn’t come cheap. But I have supported my competition endeavors for a while here; however, I am making some big decisions soon career wise. I never resigned with another company as a brand ambassador, but I now want to focus on this task, in addition to my online coaching. This is one aspect of that “Next Chapter” I intend to pursue in March. I have been busy with my online business, but I feel ready to take on more now that I am back Florida and once I am finished with my next two shows.
This Upcoming Weekend
I will be doing some filming exclusively for FitnessRx for Women, and I will also update you on a new show I am adding to my schedule and where that will be in my next video blog.