Choose Friends Who Inspire You to Become Better

Are the People Closest to You Toxic?

Take a look around you. I bet you have a lot in common with the people you hang around. Do you all like to go out for beer? Is Tuesday “taco night” with all your girlfriends? Do you all commiserate about the perfect guys you feel you will never find? I bet your paychecks are fairly similar as well.

“We are the average of the five people we spend the most time with?” –Jim Rohn

Choose Friends Who Inspire You to Become Better

Even as adults, we have peer pressure. Our friends play a huge role in how we think and feel. We trust their advice, we believe in their experiences and we tend to have similar values. But are they the reason we are stuck in our circumstances? While I’m not telling you to disown your friends and family, it has been proven that we tend to become most like the five closest people to us.

“Show me your friends and I’ll show you your future.” –unkown

When you start spending time around people who have what you would like to have or are where you want to be, you will begin to think like they do, pick up habits they have and learn ideas you may not be able to learn from a book. You can watch how they respond to problems, see things in new ways and make choices you may not have thought of.

Sometimes we need to stop and evaluate our relationships to determine if those around us are helping or hindering us. Changing your environment may be necessary to help you reach goals, pick up better habits and grow your circle of influence. There may be people who are toxic to your life that you shouldn’t spend time with. There may be others who inspire and uplift you, daring you to become a better person.

So how do we change our situation? Check out these tips from How the People Around You Affect Personal Success by Leo Widrich at

1. Write down and look at the five people you spend the most time with.

2. Think about those five people, their success, happiness, income, etc.

3. Evaluate whether these people are where you want to be or will help you get to the next level.

4. Make a choice about who you want to spend more time with.

My tip: Pick two or three people who are where you want to be. Find a way to put yourself in their space (invite them to coffee or attend a class they put on).

Melissa Fillmore

Melissa Fillmore is a former NPC National level Figure and Women's Physique competitor. She is a personal trainer, health and wellness coach and owner of Fillmore Fitness, LLC in Pasco, Washington. Melissa lives with her husband Craig and 4 of her 5 children. The oldest is currently serving our country in the Marines.

Facebok: fillmorefitness
Instagram: @melissafillmore_1

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